40% of Single Adults Say They Weren’t Taught This Important Part of Sex

September is World Sexual and Reproductive Health Month, so it’s a good time to look beyond the usual conversations about contraception and STIs and ask a different question: did sex education actually prepare people for relationships and intimacy?

This question is answered by an interesting study from the Kinsey Institute. Researchers asked 3,895 single adults in the U.S. what they learned about sex, relationships, and sexuality when they were younger. The study came out in 2025 and used data from 2023, but its findings tap into a familiar problem: knowing the biology of sex doesn’t necessarily translate into knowing how to navigate intimacy.

The majority of the participants (54.6%) said they learned about reproduction or pregnancy in school. But many of the topics that can become important once people actually start dating got much less attention. More than a third said they did not learn from any source when they were young how to tell a partner what they wanted sexually, how to talk about sex with a partner, how to date, how to decide whether they wanted to have sex, or how to build a healthy romantic relationship.

That gap is especially interesting during the month that celebrates sexual and reproductive health. Sexual health, according to the World Health Organization, “is not just a matter of reproduction or the avoidance of disease, but something that influences how people form relationships, make decisions and navigate consent throughout their lives.”

When it comes to the topic of sex after any serious health issue, it’s important that partners (if there are any) are also involved in the discussion and recovery. “It’s not only heart attack patients who have concerns,” says Steinke, “they’re partners have at least as many concerns, or sometimes more concerns and more anxiety, about resuming sexual activity.” Aside from having the physician speak with both the patient and their partner about their sex life, Steinke recommends that partners ease back into sex by doing other physical activities together, like going for a walk. “Physically being active together promotes, not only physical capacity, but also intimacy,” she says.

The Most Important Sex Lessons May Not Be About Sex

Sex education remains, for many, about puberty, reproduction, contraception and STIs. Those topics obviously matter, but the Kinsey Institute research suggests some adults felt they were missing another piece of the picture: the interpersonal side of intimacy.

It doesn’t always come naturally: the skills of knowing how to communicate what you want, setting boundaries, understanding consent, and having an uncomfortable conversation with a partner. According to the study, 40.3% of participants said that more sex education would have given them more sexual confidence, and 44.3% said it could have resulted in healthier romantic relationships.

And that’s where things get a bit more complicated today. You might say there’s more sexual information available than ever before, from social media and podcasts to dating advice and online communities. But having endless information at your fingertips doesn’t mean you know which advice is trustworthy, or how to apply it to a real-life relationship.

Sex education doesn’t have to stop when someone leaves school, the researchers say. Their findings point to the value of evidence-based information for adults, particularly around relationships, communication and sexual decision-making.

Ultimately, sexual confidence isn’t about knowing everything. It can be as simple as feeling comfortable enough to ask questions, communicate boundaries, and tell a partner what you want.” And maybe the bigger lesson of the study: Sex education has probably taught generations of people how sex works, with some of them left to figure out the human part on their own.

source https://www.mensjournal.com/sex-relationships/40-of-single-adults-say-they-werent-taught-this-important-part-of-sex